Laugh Die You 3 The Karaoke Singapore

May 24, 2016 in Events, Musings, Photos

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The MOST ANTICIPATED Comedy event is coming to Singapore! Singapore Vs Malaysia We’re coming to you on 9th and 10th JULY 2016!  15% OFF on tickets purchase! visit www.sistic.com.sg for more info now! Show and location: Resorts World Theater, Resorts World Sentosa. 9th and 10th JULY 2016 @ 7.30pm!

Laugh Die You 3 The Karaoke

April 20, 2016 in Events, Musings

laugh die you

“Are You Ready For A Show Like No Other”

Laugh Die You 3 is coming to you!! Another Super Show I will be involved along side KUMAR and Gurmit Singhas 29th & 30th April – 7:30pm @ HGH Convention Centre KL – Then 13th May – 7:30pm @ Dewan Sri Pinang, Penang. Buy your tickets @ http://vip.my/laugh-die-you-3/

 

 

Fatty Boom Boom

April 12, 2016 in Blog Posts, Events, Musings

fatty boom boom

                                                            A SHOW CLUB LIKE NO OTHER

Look what’s Booming Soon! Are you ready for KL’s sexiest show club? Hosted by Boom Boom Room’s original comedy divas, Bibi Kay Poh & Joanne Kam. Welcome to the revolution. Fatty BOOM BOOM @ Tropicana City Mall ( on top of Swine restaurant) Opening Friday 15th April onwards. The whole of April is by special invitations so to get on my special guestlist whatsapp Naomi @ 0122135951: Every Fri & Sat night 10pm. Check out my Facebook page https://www.facebook.com/joannekamcomedy/ for more updates and information.

 

Esquire: Dirty Thoughts

April 11, 2016 in Blog Posts, Musings

 

Sometimes it’s all right to get your mind into the gutter, as long as you don’t fall in yourself.

esquire dirty thought

“Esquire Malaysia October 2011″  http://www.esquire.my Esquire have kindly allowed me to reprint the monthly articles that I’ve been writing for them for the last few years. This week’s blast from the past comes from October 2011. Check out Esquire Malayisa each month for my latest articles.

Everybody has sexual fantasies. And you can bet your bottom ringgit that even your partner, who’s obviously in a happy, healthy, and loving relationship with you has, at one time or another, thought about someone else while in throes of ecstasy. And we all know the couple where one of them is the good-looking half and the other one is the half that only a mother or a drunken sailor could love. Take the dearly departed Anna Nicole Smith and her dearly departed, eighty-something- year-old, multimillionaire husband. I’m sure she must’ve fantasised about all those Benjamin Franklins whenever she had to lay her hands on him. And what goes around comes around. Women suff er from the Madonna/whore complex, too. You know, a lady on the street but a freak in the bed. It’s why even the most conservative women will starve themselves to squeeze into some lacy knickers or crotchless panties, because they know that playing dress-up as a Victoria’s Secret angel or role modelling as skanky ho will get their men just a little more pumped up. After all, a man’s overactive imagination is horny thing. Just ask those geek princesses who doll up every Halloween in Princess Lea’s slave girl gold bikini. It sure lights up the sabres on those Jedi wannabes.

So the question is, is mental infidelity so wrong? To me, having dirty thoughts about someone other than your partner is pretty normal. It might even spice up your sex life—as long as you keep it only in your head and, for goodness sake, open your eyes just before the end and say the right name. According to a survey by the University of Vermont, eighty four percent of American couples confessed that they fantasied about someone else during sex, with some couples admitting that they felt guilty, immoral, and even hurt about their soggy dreams. But what the survey also learned is that this eighty four percent chalked up greater sexual gratification and had fewer sexual problems than those who worried that their wandering minds would harm their relationships.

In a perfect world, couples should and would be thinking only about each other while naked together, but sometimes you can’t stop your subconscious from shoving your teenage dream into the act. Of course, sometimes it reminds of you of that time you walked into your parents’ bedroom while they were … you know. Truth is, there is a difference between lust and love, and hopefully you know where to draw the line. Besides, more often than not, a fantasy will stay that way because we know better than to jeopardise the real thing that we’ve got. Ultimately, dirty thoughts can be fun, and they should be frivolous, and they better damned well be short-lived. Because if you’re dreaming about shagging your wife’s best friend all the bloody time, then you need to do some serious soul-searching. In the meantime, wake up and take a cold shower.

 

Esquire: Love Self Service

April 8, 2016 in Blog Posts, Musings

esquire     ESQUIRE: DIRTIEST MOUTH IN MALAYSIA

“Esquire Malaysia September 2011″  http://www.esquire.myEsquire have kindly allowed me to reprint the monthly articles that I’ve been writing for them for the last few years. This week’s blast from the past comes from September 2011. Check out Esquire Malayisa each month for my latest articles.

 

 I’ve recently begun exploring one of the most important secrets to a woman’s satisfaction—the female orgasm and that little DIY kit every woman should have tucked away in her bedside drawer. It’s not something we want to discuss over tea, but it’s a much appreciated tool for the modern woman nonetheless. In fact, Ann Summers has invented a masterpiece called the iGasm, a device that plugs into your iPod and vibrates to the music you play.

Here’s a suggested playlist: Start with a little hip-hop bump and grind, move on to some dancey house tunes, then hit it hard with the drums and bass—for Ah Lien girls who like it faster, there’s always the techno feng tau beat— and then take it down with a little ambient to smooth the ride out. Apple wasn’t thrilled with how the app was advertised, which showed a dancing girl with wires coming out of her iPod and going into her knickers, but that didn’t stop the iGasm from finding its place in the urban dictionary.

So how did this gadget that inhabits the core of a woman’s self-reliance handbook come to be? The fi rst pleasure devise appeared in 1870 in Britain and was a steam-powered device called The Manipulator. (Why do I have images of Arnold Schwarzenegger doing an ad campaign for this with the tagline: “The Manipulator. Come with me.”) During the Victorian era, there was a little female hysteria called “worm fury” and the only way to treat this frenzy was to massage the patient into “paroxysm”, or what we call orgasm today.

Doctors would treat patients by performing “vulvular stimulations”, an immensely tedious process that caused doctors to suff er hand and wrist fatigue. The Manipulator was hence a relief for doctors who made it an entirely nonsexual clinical device. The electric vibrator was later introduced to become the housewives’ perfect home companion, and there’s been countless variations created to appease their much-needed cravings since then.

There are devices that look like back massagers and even more exotic ones that look like rabbits, beavers, butterfl ies, and eggs. Designers have also cloaked these stimulants for travel purposes
by disguising them as lipstick cases, torches, and now MP3 players, all conveniently sized for a woman’s handbag. It’s no wonder that every time I take my turbo inhaler out for my asthma, I see a look of shock on people’s faces as if to say, “I can’t believe she took it out in public!” I think it’s quite funny. In fact, the last time I took my pump out for a puff , a male friend stared at me in disbelief, to which I had to say, “If it was what you think it is, it’ll be bigger than this. What, you think it’s made in China?”